Monday, 17 December 2007

Self-Belief- Revisited

Yesterday as I was doing the Hoovering, it felt like I was putting too much effort into it and it was making me feel exhausted. In thought I asked for help.

"Let us do the cleaning for you," the Inner Voice said.
"You mean you want to help me clean?"
"No, not help you clean, let us do the cleaning."

I relaxed and let my "friends" take over. I felt this immense power take over my body and started moving the Hoover. It was done effortlessly and in no time at all.

For a while now the Inner Voice has been asking me to let Love do everything. The thing is I can cope with the idea of being assisted but letting go of everything has been one I've been struggling with. Let's say I'm carrying four bags of shopping and someone offers to help me carry them. I don't mind someone helping me carry the load when it is shared. But the idea of giving up all my bags so someone else can carry them while I walk with nothing has been a hard one to release.

Giving up total responsibility has brought up issues of faith and even guilt. Am I able to let someone carry my weight? Can I trust in another to carry all my weight? Why would I want to burden someone else anyway?

I've found that I'm always given the choice as to whether I wish to let go completely or not. The choice to let Love take over is like a medical consent form. Before undergoing any surgery, a patient is given a consent form which informs him or her about the procedure and the risks involved. The patient has to decide whether he's willing to go through the procedure. I've experienced surgery three times. The first time I was 7 years old and too young to give my consent so my mother did so on my behalf. The other times I was an adult so I gave my consent signifying that I had complete faith and trust in the surgeon and the procedure.

If I can trust in the surgeon and medicine, why is it so hard to completely give up control in other areas of my life?

I guess I knew that if I wanted to be well, I had to let myself be cared for in the way I believed at the time. Besides, looking after my needs is what the doctors and nurses are paid to do. I also knew that as soon as I was well I would be fit and able to carry my own weight at all times.

Let's return to the shopping bags analogy. When I let someone else carry all my bags, I'm trusting in the other's ability to carry my bags. Why feel guilty about giving up my load when the other has volunteered and is happy carrying my load? It could very well be I'm making the other feel needed. I know whenever I've offered to carry someone's shopping, it has given me lots of joy. Similarly, when I allow Love to carry my load, I am demonstrating faith in Love and my faith enables "miracles" to occur.

In the book Journey Home, Tonika Rinar shares how she opened up to her higher self, though she couldn't believe it was her very own self at the time. The book is about her journey of self-discovery. In one example, Tonika shares how she was sitting on a swing and feeling it swing without making any effort on her part. How was this possible? Because she let the swing move her which swung higher and higher. When she wanted the swing to stop she told it to and it did.

I know that Love interpenetrates all time, all space and all realities. I know that this Love is actually my true self. So when I let Love "do the cleaning", all I'm doing is activating the presence of Love in all things to do the work, just like Tonika did when she let the swing swing her. I am also demonstrating belief in Self. The good news is since infinite Love is my true self, I'm the one doing the work which means I'm still in control anyway. Ha! You can't keep a control freak down! ;-)

I feel as if things have stepped up now. This is a whole new level of Self-belief. I look forward to experiencing the infinite power of Love in all things.

I trust in Love; I believe in my Self.


Related articles: Higher Powers; Muddy Boots; The Mind Boggles; Cause or Effect?; If At First You Don't Succeed, Stop Trying; Can We All Play?; The Weaker, the Stronger; Awakening; Trust in Love to Sort out the Details; Dependence; The Magician; Putting the Under-Utilised Workers to Work; Self-Belief